another blog post about love.

Disclaimer, i don’t know where this is going, and there might not be a point, but the name of the blog is ‘me i think’ so embrace the free fall into the rabbit’s hole.

Love, lust, sexytime and all things related, what a friend and i were talking about over reggae and incense recently. I would say he considers himself to be ‘enlightned’ least i know he isn’t ashamed of his opinions and we got to talking about relationships. Why we were both still single had to pop up. *sigh*. my self-diagnosis; Cristina syndrome. I know what i don’t want, that’s all that’s around me apparently…
Enlightened friend however had different views. I’ll write it like he put it…

Billions of people on this earth, different personalities, temper fuses, values, moral convictions, etc etc, but since the standard is dating – relationship – marriage (maybe) we, the earthlings are forced to conform to social norms that we didn’t ever think of questioning before. He said that having a title like ‘boyfriend’ or ‘fiance’ equals expectations (plus sex of course) but mostly expectations, and we know how that goes. Girl knows ‘friendly dude’ and he graduates to ‘Mr. Man’ (we all know because she put it on her facebook) and suddenly ‘Mr Man’ is expected to call more than often, pick up when you’re having a bad day, bring chocolate cake to Girl’s door because she has a craving etc etc. In most cases, ‘Mr Man’ never really delivers like he is supposed to and that’s when the disappointment factor is introduced.
Enlightened friend also talked about how when a couple becomes official. They are basically announcing to the world that they are knocking boots. -that’s the phrasre right? Knocking boots? Intercoursing?

He does sound skeptical, but i see his point.

Then with all these ‘he’s not that into you’ types of books and movies, Cosmopolitan and similar types of magazines that cause ‘Girl’ to get confused when ‘Mr Man’ doesn’t put a smiley face at the end of his text… do they consider that we are all individuals? With different ways of showing affection? We can’t all do three dates, and fidget with our keys (ladies) at the end of the third date, and invite ‘friendly dude’ in for coffee, end up having awesome sex, hence changing his status to ‘Mr Man’. It obviously can’t go that way for all of us.
Personally, i don’t have that many keys. I’d look silly trying to fidget with all the two keys on my key ring!
Maybe ‘friendly dude’ was actually busy and was gonna get around to calling before you shut him down.
We can’t all get fairytale endings. So now what?

Enlightened friend of mine believes in doing things his way. I’m on the fence with this one. Of course i would want ‘friendly dude’ to call. (whoever he is, situation pending), but because he wants to! Enlightened friend might just be lazy. It takes a minute to send a text! And now there’s qwerty keypads on phones!
He still does believe in love of course. Which is great, just not the conventional process of it.
Love is complicated.
What is love anyway? Relationships? Sex?
Whatever it is, it’s out there. I believe.
Finding it however, is something else all together.

On an unrelated note,
I like big butts and i cannot lie, you other brothers can’t deny, that when a girl walks in with an itty bitty waist and a round thing in your face, you get sprung… -Sir Mixalot.

deuces!

 

artsy fartsy nairobi (ch 1)

• poetry/ open mic/spoken word/ etc

Art is the new black. Especially for the college students and yuppies of urban Nairobi.  Suddenly my facebook events page is flooded with all these artsy gigs. An open mic here, a poetry slam there and a live band same night, different location.

Before I get into my hater mobile and go all negative Nancy, I have to give credit where it’s due. To the old school writers and poets, the ones I don’t even know about, the old bands like five alive, zanaziki, hardstone etc, the ones that stuck it out even before the whole afro-pop-fusion thing became huge. People like imani woomera that started pushing poetry performances in Kenya, foundations like kwani trust. You all get my props! To some extent we’re more cultured. There’s more to Nairobi’s night scene than bendover Thursday rooftop parties.

Artsy gigs have far since fallen from glory. From power failures during performances (I will not name names), to venues being over crowded. Not forgetting how most of them have now become fancy meet and greets. -guilty! I did go to chill with my twitter at some kwani? Open mic gig. I’m not proud, l east I paid attention to most of the performances, got good seats in front. But still that particular gig had flaws:  it was way too crowded, it was suspiciously dark. (I know the lights are dimmed for the ambience but seriously…) then there was this ‘celeb’ corner… I remember seeing nameless and tony mochama – maybe i’m bitter coz I’m a big fan and couldn’t work up the gall to introduce myself -to smitta of course. Nameless can politely chill.

The music scene is changing too. a couple of years ago, I would never had thought that Kenyans would accept more than kapuka and genge and sijui boomba  from local artists and now, there’s musicians like Sauti Sol, Stan, Atemi, Dela, Kanji, Chizi and so many more making their mark in the industry. Every other weekend there’s events like blankets and wine and more recently shukas and juice (I’ll get back to this) where they get to perform. Most poetry gigs now have live bands that are apparently doing pretty well. I’ve had of Anto and the Paragasha band, lele, Ma3, darubini.  It’s exciting. Even for someone like me who isn’t in Kenya for most of the year?

It IS exciting. Before I forget about blankets and wine, I loved the concept, the name; it was a good gimmick and has been successful. Most the top and upcoming artists have performed; it’s a lovely platform for undiscovered talent. Only problem I would have with the event is if it rained. The new event however… ‘shukas and juice’. I feel they could have been a tad more creative with the name. shukas and juice just sounds like a sober knock off. that’s all I have to say about that.

back to the spoken word performances though. before I digress further, here are my qualms; the quality of performances is going down, I can’t compare the poets I saw in late 2007 to the ones I saw this year. at the same gigs. everybody’s a poet now, and some of the guys are just out to impress the ‘deep’ chicks in the beads and head wraps… even the content of the poems have become more commercial. with pop culture references and just random things, the art itself is spreading, yes, but some diluted, less intense, more flawed version.

which has led to other trends, the veteran poets don’t even show up to events they founded and used to frequent, there are also the ‘gig snobs’ first scale the line up of performers before deciding to attend an event, the upcoming poets whoa re actually good, but minus exposure go to EVERY gig they hear about but don’t get fully appreciated, people showing up ‘fashionably’ late and interrupting performances .

I can’t have done all this complaining without offering some solutions. It wouldn’t be right, right?

 So here’s what I’m thinking, since this is still a growing fad, the hosts and organizers should pick bigger venues for their events, or have limited tickets. I know the limited tickets thing is less profitable, but I twill raise the standards. The organizers could also have auditions for people who wan to perform, I know, this makes the events seem more competition-ish but, it’s just a suggestion all the same, also having intermissions before, during and after the gig so that the good people can socialize without interrupting the performances. The veteran/more established poets could also give work shops.- I know these used to happen sometime back. Also the hosts could use themes. That way the content can stay relevant, despite the language or style used.

With that being said,  I am still looking forward to coming home. There’s no place like Nairobi.

Peace and love people!

Friends, fans and artists must meet… – Erykah Badu.

 

karibuni kwangu

the world as of 07-10-2010…

exactly one week to the big 22. still learning the ropes of ‘adulthood’, whatever that means.

welcome to my world. where weird is unique, art is food, random is awesome, creativity is embraced and liberals just chill.

you cannot stop my go! – Dante Terell Smith (aka Mosdef)

 

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